Sexuality is closely connected to our sense of embodiment, our inner experience, and our self-perception. It changes throughout life, continues to develop, and is shaped by experiences, relationships, and social conditioning. And yet there are still topics that are surprisingly rarely discussed openly. One of them is the connection between sexuality, energy, and personal development. In a time full of distraction, performance pressure, and constant stimulation, many people increasingly find it difficult to consciously perceive their own bodies. Intimacy becomes functional, closeness moves into the background, and sexuality is strongly shaped by expectations. Exchanging with people who work deeply on these topics opens up new perspectives on how differently sexuality can be experienced and how closely it is linked to emotional connection, presence, and bodily awareness.
For this article, we spoke with Venus O’Hara. The British author, podcaster, and pleasure educator is based in Barcelona and has been working for many years on sexuality, self-love, and conscious intimacy. Through her podcast “The Orgasmic Lifestyle Podcast”, her work in the field of sexual wellness, and her book Orgasmic Manifestation, she explores the question of how sexual energy can be understood beyond physical pleasure.
In conversation, it quickly becomes clear that this is less about rigid concepts or spiritual rules. Instead, Venus describes sexuality as something deeply personal, closely connected to bodily awareness, attention, and inner connection. Particularly striking is her perspective on sexual energy as a form of vitality and creativity. “Sexual energy is also creative energy,” she explains. For her, sexuality does not end with physical arousal; it also influences emotional processes, self-perception, and personal development.
Sexuality as a Connection to the Body
How strongly sexuality is connected to bodily awareness became particularly clear to her through her own life story. Before she began working intensively with manifestation and conscious sexuality, she went through a difficult period in her life. She describes this time as being marked by insecurity, financial struggles, and a sense of being stuck. During this period, she began to explore personal development more deeply and first encountered the idea of consciously using sexual energy for transformation. What became clear to her was that sexuality goes far beyond physical pleasure. “It is life energy and a feeling of aliveness.” She therefore describes sexuality primarily as a state of presence and inner movement. In her interpretation, sexuality is not isolated but closely linked to emotions and self-awareness.
However, modern living conditions often make this connection more difficult. Stress and constant digital stimulation often weaken the connection to one’s body. Many people function in daily life without consciously perceiving bodily sensations. For Venus, intimacy therefore does not begin with physical closeness, but with conscious awareness of the body in everyday life.
Between Performance Pressure and Genuine Intimacy
A central question is how intimacy is experienced today. Many people also feel pressure in their sexuality. Expectations, insecurities, or the feeling of having to perform often shape access to pleasure and closeness. This frequently creates distance from the body. Venus therefore describes intimacy primarily as a state of presence. Small things such as conscious touch, slow breathing, or arriving in the present moment can already significantly change the experience of closeness. Playfulness is particularly important to her. “If you can laugh with a partner, you relax.” Humor and shared lightness often create more connection than perfection or performance. Sexuality is often taken very seriously. Many people constantly wonder whether they are attractive enough or meeting expectations. This creates pressure that can make genuine connection more difficult. Shared laughter, spontaneity, or small personal moments often create a much deeper sense of intimacy than any form of perfection.
What “Orgasmic Manifestation” Is About
A key concept in the conversation is “Orgasmic Manifestation.” It refers to the idea of consciously connecting sexuality with personal intentions. According to Venus, this is less about complex rituals and more about attention and emotional alignment. The practice is relatively simple. Before an intimate experience, a clear intention is set. This does not need to be sexual. Many people connect it with personal desires, emotional goals, or changes they wish to bring into their lives. During the following intimate experience, whether solo or with a partner—a conscious connection is then formed between these thoughts, emotions, and bodily awareness. For example, an intention might be to develop more self-confidence in a professional context or to become open to new career opportunities. This inner direction is consciously linked with emotions such as gratitude or anticipation before the experience and held in the background during it. At the moment of orgasm, this feeling is consciously recalled and connected again with the original intention.
Emotional experience plays a particularly important role here. Feelings such as gratitude, joy, or inner connection are central to this process. “It’s simply about setting an intention at the beginning and reconnecting with it before orgasm,” Venus explains. For her, it is primarily about becoming more conscious of oneself and one’s emotions. It also becomes clear that such topics are often polarizing. As soon as sexuality and spirituality are combined, misunderstandings or skepticism can arise. Many people automatically associate terms like “sex magic” with extreme or esoteric ideas. Venus responds to this calmly. For her, it is less about convincing people of certain concepts and more about opening new perspectives on sexuality and self-awareness.
The Body as an Access Point to Self-Awareness
The body plays a central role in her work as an access point to greater self-awareness. While many people spend their daily lives mostly in their heads, bodily signals and subtle sensations often fade into the background. For Venus, this creates a kind of separation between mind and body that can also affect intimacy and emotional closeness. Rather than viewing intimacy purely as an interpersonal moment, she also sees it as a capacity to return to the body itself. This is less about specific techniques and more about a fundamental shift in attention: away from judgment and control, toward perception. Small, everyday practices play an important role here. Conscious breathing, brief moments of pausing, or slow, attentive touch can help strengthen the connection to the body. Eye contact is also described as a form of presence that is often underestimated, as it requires immediate attention and emotional openness. This form of bodily awareness does not only affect intimate experiences but also everyday life. People who are more grounded in their bodies often react less automatically, recognize their own needs more clearly, and develop a more refined sense of boundaries and emotional states. For Venus, this reconnection to the body is an essential part of self-love and therefore also a foundation for stable, conscious relationships.
Between Shame, Spirituality and Openness
Although sexuality is more visible today than in the past, many topics are still associated with insecurity or shame—especially when sexuality is linked with spirituality or personal development. This connection often polarizes strongly. Venus explains that some people react with openness and curiosity, while others are more skeptical. This also reflects how strongly sexuality is socially evaluated.
For her, however, conscious sexuality does not mean following fixed rules or spiritual systems. Rather, it is about finding one’s own access. Sexuality is individual, changes over time, and evolves with experience and bodily awareness. In this lies, for Venus, the possibility of experiencing sexuality in a freer and more conscious way. “Pleasure has almost been demonized, as if it were not important.” Her daily life consists of various interconnected activities. These include content creation and podcast work as well as educational content on sexuality and self-awareness. This is complemented by her work as a product tester in the sexual wellness field, as well as meditative and body-oriented practices that also shape her own working method. She connects all these areas with the goal of making sexuality accessible as something conscious, natural, and self-determined.
Conclusion
Our interview with Venus O’Hara shows how closely spirituality and sexuality can be connected. The focus is less on fixed concepts or practices and more on presence and the connection to one’s own body. In a world full of distraction and constant stimulation, this creates a different perspective on intimacy. Sexuality is understood less as a function and more as an opportunity to become more aware of oneself and to develop a deeper connection to one’s body. Perhaps this is the key message of the conversation: access to intimacy often begins much earlier than expected—in small moments of attention, in the feeling of returning to the body, and in the willingness to experience sexuality more consciously as part of one’s life.
About Venus O’Hara
Venus O’Hara is a British author, podcaster, and holistic self-love content creator based in Barcelona. In 2009, she made the conscious decision to leave her career in luxury real estate behind and launch her own sex blog. A step that quickly evolved into a long-term professional and personal transformation. Her work has been featured in international media outlets such as The Guardian, Daily Mail, El PaĂs, GQ, and Playboy, and has received significant public attention over the years. One example of her early media presence is her widely discussed article in The Guardian, in which she describes how sexual energy can be connected to personal goal achievement: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/may/01/my-life-in-sex-woman-who-achieves-goals-by-masturbation
Today, she is best known for her “The Orgasmic Lifestyle Podcast,” which explores topics related to pleasure, wellness, relationships, and conscious living. An overview of her work, her projects, and her approach to the so-called Orgasmic Lifestyle is also provided by her own platform. Alongside her work as an author and podcaster, she works as a sex toy designer, pleasure educator, and meditation teacher on Insight Timer. She has tested and reviewed more than 1,000 products in the sexual wellness field, which has significantly shaped her understanding of intimacy, product development, and evolving needs in modern sexuality.
A central part of her work is the concept of Orgasmic Manifestation, also the title of her book Orgasmic Manifestation: Transform Your Life with Your Sexual Energy. Since discovering this practice in 2018, she describes profound changes in her life and self-perception. She understands sexuality less as a purely physical experience and more as a form of energy and inner alignment.
@venusohara
Youtube: Venus O’Hara – YouTube
Instagram: venusohara
Further insights into her work:
https://graziadaily.co.uk/life/in-the-news/what-is-orgasm-manifestation
https://www.bustle.com/wellness/o-method-sex-magick-manifestation-tiktok
FAQ
What is sexual energy?
For many people, sexual energy describes far more than physical arousal. It is often understood as a connection between vitality and creativity and is closely linked to body awareness, presence, and inner connection.
What does “Orgasmic Manifestation” mean?
Orgasmic Manifestation describes the idea of consciously connecting sexuality with personal intentions or desires. Before intimate moments, people focus on specific thoughts or goals and emotionally connect them with positive feelings.
Is conscious sexuality connected to spirituality?
This can be understood very differently. For some people, the focus is primarily on body awareness and presence, while others additionally connect sexuality with spiritual or energetic concepts. What matters most is always the personalapproach.
Why do many people struggle to connect with their bodies?
Stress, pressure to perform, and constant distractions often affect body awareness. Many people function continuously in everyday life and therefore lose conscious contact with physical sensations and intimacy.
How can people reconnect more deeply with their bodies?
Often, small things already help — conscious breathing, slow touch, or moments of calm and attention. Becoming more aware of the body in everyday life can also support a stronger sense of connection and presence.